The news that DMX passing away has flooded my timeline on every social media website. It cannot be avoided even when I stay offline because my phone has also been bombarded with messages about his death. Triggered and Bitter are two words that have been assigned to me when discussing my feelings about DMX and you know what? You’re goddamn right I am both of those.
As everyone today has decided to remember DMX for their favorite songs and lyrics, the “good” that he has done as some will put it. Unlike them, I cannot overlook and/or forget the fact that in 2003, DMX wrote, recorded,published and performed “Where The Hood At?”. A song that is a direct attack on my entire existence as well as anyone who is gay and any woman who is trans. The exact lyrics and be mindful, here is the trigger warning are :
“Man, cats don’t know what it’s gonna be
Fuckin with a nigga like me, D-to-the-M-to-the-X
Last I heard, y’all niggaz was havin sex, with the SAME sex
I show no love, to homo thugs
Empty out, reloaded and throw more slugs
How you gonna explain fuckin a man?
Even if we squashed the beef, I ain’t touchin ya hand
I don’t buck with chumps, for those to been to jail
That’s the cat with the Kool-Aid on his lips and pumps
I don’t fuck with niggaz that think they broads
Only know how to be ONE WAY, that’s the dog”.
- DMX, “Where The Hood At?”
As a trans woman and lesbian, there is no other way of seeing it as cis people have asked me to do and if there’s any other way that you can see it then shame on you. On Facebook, an old friend had attempted to shame me for not wishing DMX peace in his death. He said that it was wrong of me to speak up on this in his death because DMX could not offer a response despite 18 years passing since the songs release and no apology has been offered from him. He said that I shouldn’t judge DMX’s entire character based on this “one wrong” despite there being no proof that he hasn’t done any physical harm to gay or trans women. That also ignores the fact that members of the LGBTQIA community have been murdered by plenty of men who shared the same views and beliefs as DMX. This interaction was quite surprising being that this old friend referred to himself as an ally. This got me thinking about how the term ally has been taken on by people who are the opposite of one and it has been weaponized against us and used to gaslight us into accepting and forgiving oppression and hate.
How is it that DMX can say some of the most harmful lyrics written and receive praise and the effected receive negative backlash for not forgiving it when there was no apology offered in the first place? How is it that a celebrity can receive more understanding being hateful than a close “friend” can receive when being the victim of hate? Is this due to celebrity worship? or is it that transphobia and homophobia still isn’t seen as an issue to society? DMX has passed away and I am not wishing him any peace in his passing because we do not get to live in peace because of him and people who share his beliefs and feelings about our existence.